At my younger age I use to think that religion is the only way to have peace and refuge from God, but as I grow into my age of reason; I get to know that religion is the worst thing that has happened to mankind; and they were all invented out of doubts and fears. Even to think of all the greatest calamity that has befall mankind, religions has a major impact.
I was stuck in this one-way belief for years and I couldn’t free myself from it, even if I try to break free it only last for a short period of time till I went back, all these doctrines were burnt into my ROM-BIOS since my younger age and most happen at home, schools and churches that I’ve attended.
Sometimes I do as I like but only in closet and where no one pious is watching, because religion taught that we don’t own ourselves and that we can’t do as we like, we’re sinners and slaves of God and that we have to live our lives for him and to beg for his mercies till the end of our days and even in afterlife if all our sins were forgiven and we are able to make it to his heavenly kingdom.
I started thinking and acting like a freethinker from my teenage years but I don’t really know what it’s like to be a freethinker back then, but I read books and listen to music that sharpen my mind. But still pray to God for forgiveness, mercies and favours once in a while when am somehow stuck and I couldn’t move on.
There came a time when I got myself is a situation where the tide of life was high above my neck and it seems I will self-destruct, so I seek helps where possible and I got to know that neither my parents nor other family could save me, I seek the God that lives up in the sky and everywhere but I found no help still, I read the bible (both old, new testaments and book of mormon) also I read the quran but those so-called holy books are filled with some works of arts & literature and false prophesies and none seems to be word of God as claimed by the religious apologist.
The bible stories were somehow interesting as presented, no wonder it’s the best-selling book ever written despite it has no author, ha-ha! But quran is filled with mostly horror contents, most of its stories were not clear and the writers snip from bible stories; it’s a pirated version of bible. God in the bibles & quran was presented as a magician, racist, bigot, ethnic cleansing, misogynist, feeble-minded etc.
Those books were filled with stories of human right abuse, bigotry, misogyny, rape, war in all its kinds, extremism, slavery, radicalisations, debauchery, incest, fornication and adultery, murders, polygamy etc.
At the end, I see myself bigger and better than how the so-called holy books portrayed me and I was able to give up on all hearsay “revealed” religions with all its heresies.
I’m now free like a bird, I soar higher above all hearsay “revealed” religions with all its heresies and I perceive God in new awesome, great and peaceful perspective.
I thank my innate God for the new me, and I feel so great to be an intellectual spiritual being.